Sickness

I've been feeling pretty sick since I was in Jersey this past weekend, possibly from living in the smoke infested apartment of my brother's... I am feeling quite sore all over my body, pain in my stomach, nauseated if I move too much. Today I was awoken to the pleasure of excruciating pain on both my shoulders which effectively removed my ability to do anything for spurts of 5-10 seconds throughout the day.

Maybe it was because I was unable to "do" anything for most of the day, but I began to wonder what it's like for God to look into our hearts.

You know, the sin-tainted, wounded, bruised hearts we carry around every day.

I'm not God, but I would imagine his heart would break every day knowing full well that all 7 billion on earth are struggling with this problem of sin, and that it's perpetuating into pain and suffering in our lives.

So our hearts end up looking a pulp of beaten up, ragged, disfigured garbage for the lack of a better word, from the time...

When your family broke apart in two...
When you suffered abuse at the hand of another person...
When you were rejected by your so-called friends...
When your family members never expressed love to you...
When you felt abandoned by a friend or a significant other...
When you failed to live up to your expectations...
When you ________________________________...

I think the craziest thing, though, is how God took his whole, pure, full, and holy heart, and offered it to ALL of us through Jesus. Jesus took our soiled, rotten-to-the-core hearts, and offers his untainted heart. I think that's crazy. Why would you do such a thing to whom you don't owe anything, to someone who doesn't want it, to someone who hates you, to someone who could care less about it?

It's so foolish -

No.

It's crazy love.

And we're living it every day.

**Please spare me the theological debate... I am fully conscious and aware that I am not making much sense due to my aforementioned sickness. I haven't quite come to a conclusion on another topic I wanted to write about, but it ended up going in a totally different direction (one which wasn't completely thought out, as you can tell from what I've written... heh)